Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Who likes chocolate, bears and giveaways?

Holy guacamole, you guys, I've been a busy bee. I know it appears, by my lack of posting, that I have failed to write. That is not the case. I've been writing like a maniac. Still, after 28+ hours of writing over the last four day on my 2013 project, I do not yet have a post worthy of publishing. In the words of my friend when she was trying to pedal a bike while intoxicated, "This is HARD!"

So I took a break and watched The Bachelor. Wow. Just... wow. I think I burned some major brain cells on that. (And yes, I will watch it next week too, because apparently I like damaging my brain.) I also started reading yet another Nicholas Sparks book, because it seems that I like sobbing uncontrollably over fictional characters. Then it got worse. I was in my truck yesterday and I mindlessly started singing along with the radio. I soon realized that I knew all the words to One Direction's "What Makes You Beautiful". I don't even know how that happened. In a vain attempt to pretend that didn't happen, I pushed play on my CD player and commenced with my singing along... with a frog... and the ABC song.

 It's official. I've lost my edge.

Now that I need to restore my self pride and reboot process of reasoning, I will offer a look back at my, ehem... accomplishments in the last four days.

  • I showered four times.
  • I made a mask out of egg, honey and avocado, smeared it on my face and frightened my children. It was magical.
  • I successfully removed the cat puke stain from my lacy white tank top.
  • I baked and consumed a delicious blackberry cobbler.
  • I went to a yoga class and didn't fall into a pathetic, post-flu heap on my mat (although my mat had been so dormant that contained a something that resembled a used cocoon... or an old spider nest).
  • At said yoga, I was required to fill out a questionnaire. One question was: What would you like to achieve with your yoga practice? My answer: World Peace.
  • I stopped myself from saying "Namaste, Motherfuckers" at the end of said yoga class.
  • I cleaned out the backseat of my pick up truck. It looked like five rabid squirrels, a wildebeest and a hungry coyote had been locked in there. I realized halfway through that I should have first donned a HazMat suit.
  • I scooped some pony poop. It's tiny and adorable, as poop goes. At least that is what I told Sarah when some of it fell from my boots onto her white carpet.
  • And lastly, my personal favorite, the book that I illustrated is now in print!
To celebrate, Brock and I drank a bottle of champagne and watched an old episode of Castle. I know what you are thinking- something like, MAN! Those two know how to PARTY.

Also, I'm giving a book away to one of you! All you have to do is follow me on Google or Facebook  and leave a comment here or on my facebook page. You'll get an extra entry for sharing this post on Facebook, Twitter or Google + (or whatever social media that you frequent, not including the bulletin board at your local salebarn).

The winner will be announced on Friday and the book will be shipped out soon, most likely with the items from my last giveaway which I hosted before Christmas (i.e. the time period before I became Typhoid Jo.) Sorry AC and Savvy. I'll make sure and surprise you with some extra goodies in your packaging- but not blackberry cobbler because I don't think that would ship very well.

The book is titled B. Thomas the Bear's Rocky Mountain Chocolate Adventure. It is an adorable little story for children, based on a true event that happened last summer in Estes Park, CO at a chocolate shop owned by some good friends of mine. My friend asked if I would be interested in illustrating the story and I said, "Hell yes!. "Bear" in mind that I had never, ever, in my life drawn a bear before."  I also hadn't been diligently practicing drawing since Art School. When I say "diligently", I mean "at all". I practiced a few bears then I called her back and said, "Can we make it about a horse stealing chocolate, rather than a bear? I've been drawing those since I was three!" She insisted that the story stay true to life so I buckled down, created my version of a curious yearling black bear named B. Thomas and cranked out the entire book in about two weeks. I am telling you all of this because I am terrified that people will be mean regarding my skills, or lack thereof back story always makes stuff more interesting.

Drumroll.....
     
    Ta daaa! My first book as a published illustrator!
     
     
     
     
     
If you are interested in buying one (or 20!) copies of the book, please call the Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory in Estes Park at 970-586-6601 and place your order. While you are buying your collector's item book, you can also purchase all the delectable goodies that B. Thomas loved so much, because unlike cobbler, chocolate does ship well! (Make sure and order some "Balls of Joy". Trust me. That is some serious yumminess.) 
 
$1.00 from the sale of each book will be donated to bear conservation and education programs.
 
Peace, Love and Beary Good Chocolate,
Johi
 
 
 

 

25 comments:

  1. I am so ridiculously excited for you. And to think, I knew you before you were famous!

    Confession time: I spent two weeks with my nieces age 6 and 9. I ALSO know all the words to One Direction's "What Makes You Beautiful" (and what the heck is WITH that song? He's TELLING her she's beautiful... does that mean she's no longer beautiful, because she knows she's beautiful because he told her she's beautiful?). More than that, I danced to this song on the Wii dance song with my niece, AND I saw the iCarly episode featuring One Direction. Does that mean I win? Wait. What were we talking about?

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    1. Thank you for sharing your Wii dsnce story. I feel better.

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  2. That is awesome Johi! Can I cheat and tell you that I have been studying to become a K-6 teacher with a reading endorsement, to be completed Fall 2012? I am currently taking a Children's Literature course as well as Primary Literacy and Writing & Research about Literature. Even if I don't win, please tell me how much the book costs, and I will buy it, so you can purty please send it to me for an addition to my library of children's books I am creating. Woohoo for you!!! Very exciting stuff!! And, if I know you, the illustrations are awesome! :D

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    1. Yay Emily! That is so exciting!!!! The book is $9.99 and should be on everyone's bookshelf!

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    2. Ok, that was supposed to say fall 2014...not 2012...I have 2012 still on the brain..lol! Thanks for the info, Johi! :)

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  3. Wow, Jo. That is super impressive! Published, bitches!! Yeah girl. You go. And obviously, I need that book!! And some chocolate. Yeah, all of that. Like right now. Please and thank you.

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    1. Thanks lady! The chocolate is too die for. You must call the number above and order some!

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  4. Whaaaaaa?!?! This is huge! And I feel like a proud mother even though you have never exited my birth canal. Brava!

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    1. Ahhh! * blushes* Thank you! And now I am thinking about your birth canal.

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  5. How cool is it that I even know you? I love your blog. :)

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  6. I want that book! I WANT THAT BOOK! I want that book like B. Thomas wants you to draw him a Mrs. and a cave in a chocolate mountain side!

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    1. Strange how I saw this comment and knew ( without even seeing the piv of you that yoirs truly snapped) exactly which "Sarah" wrote it.

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  7. So. AWESOME! I would LERVE a copy.

    And no worries on my... um... massager. Though we are getting a new king sized bed tomorrow, and it may "come" in handy. (hee hee!)(BTW, I'd take the blueberry cobbler, as I assume it's GF, and that is my MO, too!)

    Glad you are feeling better. Cheers to you and your BOOK!!!

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    1. Thanks! And yes, my gift will come in handy and the cobbler was GF. Enjoy your giant new bed! Sleeping in a king size is sort of like sleeping on your own island. Awesomesauce!

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    1. Ha! You'll have to get the book to find out!

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  9. Also... you as a published illustrator? AWESOMESAUCE!!!!

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  10. I love that stupid One Direction song... And It makes me so disappointed in Me. Careful... They'll suck you in!!

    Hugs!

    Valerie

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    1. Ha! As soon as I became consious of what was happening, I attempted to change the situation. The problem is that I apparently walk around unconscious most of the time.

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  11. You are amazing Johi. I think I'm gonna buy me one of those bear books for New Zealand. we need some johi illustations here. Congrats darlin xx

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    1. Love ya, Bex! Please write on your blog. I miss you!

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  12. I'm a little behind in my blog-reading, but this is FANTASTIC news!! Congrats!! I am so proud of you!

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