Friday, October 26, 2012

"With Love for Dotter"

As life swirls around us, often feeling haphazard and out of control, we sometimes struggle to make sense of things. We feel desperate to know the meaning or to find our purpose in this life. Many of us have faith, family and love as our safety net. These are places that we go to for comfort, peace and security. These are things that we always have... until we don't...

Bridget, a blogger friend of mine, whose humor, intelligence and wit I greatly admire, lost her 11 year old daughter this Wednesday.  Bridget writes at Stumbling Towards Perfect and has remained fairly anonymous with the identities of her family members. Her precious girl, whom she refers to on her blog as "Dotter", died in a car accident. Her 17 year old daughter, "Bean", was driving the car.

Becoming a parent is one of the most frightening journeys that a human can embark upon. Not only are you navigating the waters of often unknown territory, you are doing it with the deepest love in your soul and the fiercest feelings of protection and loyalty that you will ever know. That tiny, angry, shrieking infant instantly becomes the most important thing in your life. From the moment that you meet them, you know that your path is forever changed. In that moment that you first hold your child, you are suddenly overwhelmed by a kind of love that you were unaware existed. Your actual being is transformed when you become a parent.

Children change everything in your life. They can be charming and hilarious and exasperating and draining. Yet, no matter what they do, you unconditionally love them with every fiber of your being. Even though you do your best to enjoy every moment, you often live in fear that you will mess up somehow as a parent. Ever present is your greatest fear, which is to lose your child entirely.

I cannot imagine what Bridget and her family are feeling at this time. I can only imagine that it is akin to having a gaping black hole in your soul... a horrendous chasm in your very being.

Words cannot properly express my deep sympathy for this family. I struggle to make sense of any of this world, but it is particularly difficult when a child is taken from this earth. I'm a woman of faith, and I believe "Dotter" is in heaven, but I cannot imagine the anguish that Bridget and her family are experiencing. So the question arises, "What can I do?"

Another blogger, Brenna Jennings at Suburban Snapshots has set up a memorial fund for Bridget and her family. Please visit this site and donate.

In leiu of donating online, you can also give funds to a charitable account set up by the Walworth State Bank, where 100% of the funds go directly to Bridget and the family:
In Memory of "Dotter", C/O Walworth State Bank, PO Box 66, Walworth, WI 53184.

With a prayer in my heart that "Bean" recovers and that Bridget and her family can again find their way in this crazy world; I thank you all in advance for helping in any way that you can.

Hold your loved ones close.

Peace, Love and Hope,
Johi


14 comments:

  1. I found out about this tragedy today when I visited her blog and saw a comment someone had made. I am horrified and heartbroken for her. Like you, I can't even imagine how it must feel. Except that someone reaches into your chest and rips out your still beating heart. My thoughts are with her and her family and I will be donating. This is really great of you to pass this information on. I am so hopeful for Bean's recovery.

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    1. Thanks so much Misty. I don't know what else to do. My heart is broken for this family.

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  2. Oh GOD. :( There are simply no words. I will be thinking and praying for all of them. I just simply cannot imagine.

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  3. Left work early to hug my short people and take them to church to pray with me for Bridget and her family. Our hearts, love, and strength are with them all.

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    1. You're one of the good ones, Jen. Love you hard, sister friend.

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  4. I am so sorry to hear this about your friend. This is our greatest fear as any parent...losing a child...they are not supposed to leave before us. My heart goes out to this family....will be praying for comfort for her great loss and recovery and healing for her other child. Love to you, too, Johi; you are doing what you can and what you know to do, and that's all you can do; you have a grand heart.

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    1. It truly is our greatest fear. Thank you for your kind words and prayers, Emily. xxoo

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  5. This breaks my heart. I can't even imagine because if I tried, I wouldn't be able to function. Prayers for the family.

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    1. I think I imagined it a little too much. I totally stopped functioning the day I read about this on facebook.
      Thank you for your prayers for this wonderful family. xoxo

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  6. Do you know if the "Bean" is okay? I am assuming it was a really horrible accident and I pray that the "Bean" is okay and everything. I can't even imagine what Bridget is going through.

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    1. I had originally read that Bean was in critical condition but I believe that the other passenger in the car was the one injured. I just saw a pic of Bean with her little brother on facebook (post accident), so I think she is physically okay. I'm with you, this is such a tragedy and it is hard to even imagine being in their position. I've been saying lots of prayers for all of them.

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  7. Oh, Johi! This is so sweet! It was so horrible and awful and sometimes I feel like I don't know how to function... But then something happens and I feel a glimpse of hope... And that keeps me moving forward.

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    1. I imagine it would be hard to breathe some days. We are all here to support you, Bridget. I only wish I lived near you so that you could see that. Much love to you.

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