Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Connecting to Mother Earth with Cat Feces and Tonka Trucks

I recently read an article about feeling out of balance in your life. I perked up, as this seems to be a common theme for me. I continued on, absorbing the information, as the article explained that frequently "grounding yourself" with Mother Earth can combat the feeling of being disjointed and grant you some inner peace. You can accomplish this "grounding" through many simple activities: putting your hands in the dirt (gardening), standing barefoot in grass or digging your toes into sand.

And just like I do with all important information (like when I catch a glimpse of People Magazine in the grocery store checkout), I committed this new found bit of wisdom to memory for use at a later date; most likely when I am lying wide awake in bed at 2 am.

The other day,  I felt like I needed a little "grounding". My house was a trash-hole, my kids were feral, and I was PMSing. Basically, I was going batshit crazy and desperately seeking sanity.  Remembering what I had read, and taking into consideration that standing in the grass in November would be the equivalent of standing barefoot on a bale of hay/rug of dull razors, I braved the cold, ran to the kids'  sandbox and dug my naked toes into the sand. As I stood in the splendor of my Colorado yard, breathing into my diaphragm for maximum effect, I noticed many elongated lumpy shapes, and that the sand was also wet in spots ... and it hadn't rained in quite some time here. It was then that I realized that the cat has been using my Zen Garden as his personal litter box. Not only was I currently touching cat dung, but my children were playing in it on a regular basis.

I wonder if buying dewormer for your children at Whole Foods counts as becoming one with Mother Earth?

As it is, the next time I feel the need to ground myself with the Earth, I'll put my sheepskin slippers on my feet, turn on the Discovery Channel, sit my cotton robe clad arse on my leather (ish) sofa and drink a dirty martini. Dirt. Earth. Done.

Peace, Love and Sandbox Lids,


  1. Yes, I don't think November is the month to ground yourself. Manfriend cleaned all the weeds out of Cinderella's sandbox a bit ago because we were having a pirate princess bday party for her and I wanted to bury treasure in the sandbox. As soon as it was cleared (literally as soon as it was cleared), Murphy, our dog, went to the sandbox and proceeded to crap a giant Chesapeake bay retriever sized poo in the box. He has never done that before.

  2. I think you need a tropical vacation. Baltimore is lovely this time of year. ;)

  3. Well we find cat vomit on our bed...often, so sandbox, not so bad...

  4. Someone sent me a link to a heated sandbox that you can put underneath your desk.

    Two things immediately came to mind:

    1) I would never get anything done, and would probably just sit around and make sand castles.
    2) Sand + Heat = Cat magnet. Ew.

  5. What I got from your post today: I need a vacation somewhere on a sandy beach....where cats are not allowed.