Thursday, December 29, 2011

Maybe Next Year.....

♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ On the fifth day of  Christmas my true love gave to me...... nothing yet, he left super early for work. ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬

So I spent the day going on a walk with the Things and Red Dog (and her monkey noises). Then Thing 1 taught me a bunch of Knock Knock jokes that didn't make any sense, which made them even more adorable to me.

Knock Knock

Who's there?


Apple who?

Appletree orange banana! Blahahahaa!

So in light of there being nothing to talk about, I decided to make my goal list for next year. It may seem a bit early to be posting my New Year's Goals, but I say "do what feels right!" and also I say "I may forget if I don't do it now!"

In the coming year of 2012, I have some pretty big ideas about what I would like to be doing, so I'm going to WRITE IT and then DO IT. Can I get a WOOT WOOT? I even have a classy title....

Johi's Shit to Conquer in 2012:

1. Continue my reign as Ms. Wag the Dad 2012 with dignity and grace. *belch* But seriously, I'm going to think a lot more about World Peace.

2. Get Thing 1 to stop urinating in public. Like the other day, when I lost track of him after preschool and I found him outside, in the middle the front lawn with his pants around his knees and his tushie bare in the breeze, watering the grass. Did I mention his preschool is at a church? Yeah, that needs to stop.

3. Get Thing 2 to evil laugh his way onto the Ellen Show. Totally doable, I say. (I just really want to meet Ellen DeGeneres, so any way to do that would be acceptable.)

4. Get on The Babble Top 100 Mom Blogs list, like my girl Elizabeth (Flourish in Progress) did this year. Go Liz! In fact, you can help me right now please click here and hit the like button! Go ahead an share on Twitter or facebook if you are feeling particularly loving! Don't forget my ho Jen, vote for her here! xxoo

5. Secure a career that pays well GREAT but allows me to work on my own time and be there for my kids. What? I'll do it, just watch.

6. With my new income, pay off all debt then take my family on an awesome vacation- preferably somewhere warm where the drinks come with tiny umbrellas. (Then buy a newish vehicle that wasn't made in the 90's and fits more than two adult humans.)

7. Foster Thing 1's emerging interest in Art with patience and encouragement. (I'm no teacher, people)

8. Be more involved in my incredible church and give more back to my community.

9. Get Thing 2 to stop spitting on all the mirrors in the house.

10. Never again pay bills while PMSing.

11. Eat less sugar. Eat more vegetables.

12. Fix the mothereffing garage. It is so hideous that I sometimes (okay.... always) want to cry when I look at it.

13. Meet some of you fellow bloggers in person. (You'll recognize me, I'll be the one in the Green Suit) Go here if you are confused.

14. Buy new shoes. (I'm sure this won't be a problem.) Wear said new shoes with the Green Suit.

15. Get a baby goat. Or a herd of baby goats. And film them while they are doing adorable baby goat things.....and then add peppy music. Like this:

What are YOU doing next year?


  1. damn... now I want f*ing baby goats! Do you think my HOA would let me have one in my condo?

  2. I think they would allow goats. You should try. :)

  3. Please, Please make them fainting goats, that is funny shit to watch!

  4. You need fainting goats!!! Search them on YouTube!

  5. Noble goals indeed!!! lol

    Can we both wear green or will it be too confusing for folks to tell us apart?

  6. My neighbors had fainting goats. They were adorable!
    @GetReal- Noooo! You must love the goats!
    @Tish- Is yours 'pathologically violent green'? Because if it is, people would probably have a really hard time telling us apart! lmao!

  7. lol It'll be KIWI green of course!

  8. oh man pcc looks awesome! i think i'd be a lot less fugged up as a person if i had that kind of church in my youth. ha! or not. seriously that place looks great. i loved the video with the youth.

  9. @Namaste- It is the one church that I don't walk into and feel like lightening is going to strike me down!

  10. Thanks for the shout out, Sistah! My goals are simple and all of them travel oriented:

    1) AMTRAK round trip to Ft. Collins so I can go shopping with you and Sarah.

    2) Road trip to Vancouver BC to eat poutine with Mark (@yellingnearyou) and Jaime (@itssofuzzy)

    3) Maryland Ren Faire to mock men in pantaloons with Misty (@mistyslaws) and Thoughtsy (@thoughtsappear)

    4) Vegas with Liz (@Flourishinprogress), Becca (@imprettysurethat), Tazer (@tazerwarriorprincess) and Sarah (@yougotsars)

    5) BlogHer in NYC next August. Trip's already booked! WHOOT! WHOOT!

    Soooo...I guess you'd say my goals are to meet as many of you crazy blogging mofos as possible! Now, if only that whole pesky job and parenthood thing didn't get in the way...

  11. Jen- count me in on the Ft. Collins & Vegas trips. You know, when I finally win that lottery & can afford to just travel for a living. And blog. Hey, where can I find someone to pay me for travel & blogging? Hmmm, maybe that can be MY goal for 2012!

    Johi- that is a very respectable list. Mine will probably revolve around getting healthy. Unique goal, I know. But really, it's a humanitarian goal as well......if my ass gets much bigger it's going to be of Godzilla proportions and start to destroy small cities. I believe the treadmill is calling!!

  12. Yeah! I want in on the Vegas trip too!
    Did AMTRAK finally reopen that route that comes from the west coast right to Ft. Fun? I read about that a few years ago and was all excited and was going to take the train to see my friend in WA! Then I had a baby ...

    NY sounds like so much fun. If I get a job, I'm there.

    Getting healthy or maintaining health should be on everyone's list, in my opinion- so good on you Misty!

  13. JOHI - Can Vegas really handle all of that awesomeness? I'm picturing an Ocean's Eleven scenario in the making.

  14. Love your humour Johi!! I will certainly be looking in more often.Happy New Year!