Thursday, September 29, 2011

What Kind of Yard Art do You Prefer?

I like yard art. And not ironically.
I have garden gnomes, birds and toadstools hidden around on the property. My husband prefers things like truck toppers and piles of old lumber and tiles, which obviously thrills me (a woman obsessed with home decor and gardening magazines), but I digress. So imagine my glee and envy when The Bloggess bought Beyonce, the notorious giant metal chicken for herself her husband on their anniversary. Warning to husbands: This is what happens when you do not allow your spouse to buy towels.

And then I found a six foot tall metal chicken in Loveland that I could potentially call my own!

Yes, of course I pulled over and posed with it for a picture.



This rooster and I scream "gangster", don't you think?

I would have liked to load it in my truck but I didn't have the $418.95 that was the asking price. Damned groceries.

So instead of an overpriced hunk of poorly welded metal, Brock and I wisely adopted two ponies for the winter. Clearly we could win awards for our stellar decision making skills.

I'm pretty sure that the Things will enjoy the ponies more than a rusted piece of metal to play around. Both require tetanus shots, so why not pick the fuzzy ones that eat and poop (and eat and poop and eat and poop)?


OMG PONIES!!!!!

So, as sad as it is that I left the metal chicken by the side of the road in Loveland, we have two new pieces of yard art.

Meet Blizzard and Duke.


Blizzard- The Happy Appy!


Duke- The Quaint Paint.
 

Welcome boys! We are thrilled to have you!

Peace, Love and OMG PONIES!!!!,
Johi

20 comments:

  1. Will you adopt me? Because I fucking LOVE ponies.

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  2. Hey! I saw those chickens on the road up to Sylvan Dale just the other day, and I thought of you. The ponies are beautiful!

    -Francesca

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  3. I'm hoping to find a small version of the metal chicken. I figure they won't charge $418.00 for a smaller version and I will be more sucessful in getting Husband to agree to leaving a smaller metal chicken in the yard. Husband just doesn't get the whole "knock knock MOFO" thing.

    I love the ponies! I had a pony, once. I loved my pony, even after he tried to kill me.

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  4. There's a giant (and I mean as tall as house) chicken in the town I live in. They have a really long driveway so the thing stands guard by the road. I've always been jealous of the family that lives there. I mean, who wouldn't want a giant chicken?! You can even hop on the back of the chicken -- but it doesn't go anywhere. For the sake of your children I'm glad you got the ponies. They're going to be WAY more fun! (Even if they do poop.)

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  5. OMG Best. Day. Ever. I'm so happy for you (and just a wee bit jealous!) Lots of warm, fuzzy, snuggly pony love to you!!!!

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  6. $418 is totally reasonable for the chicken. I'd pay twice that for a giant cock.

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  7. I am going to patiently wait for them to be dresses as unicorns for Halloween and all the other days.

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  8. @Jaclyn- Do you like to clean, entertain small children and give foot rubs? Because if you answered yes to all of those, then my answer is yes- i will adopt you.
    @Francesca- Thanks! You will have to bring the girlies by for some pony time!
    @Tina- I am so glad that you commented on this. I have missed you. Do you see the smaller one in the picture? I'm sure it was under $200. Tell your husband that he is probably thinking too hard...
    @Phoenix- Yay for Giant Chickens AND ponies!
    @Aubrey- Thanks! Pony love right back at you!
    @Jen- Will you marry me?
    @Tova- That is a brilliant idea.... my wheels are turning....

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  9. I so would have bought that chicken. The hubs would NOT have been pleased. I saw one of those right after The Bloggess' post as my whole family was driving down the beach and almost made the hubs do a U-turn so I could take a picture of me standing with it. But I resisted because he would have thought I was insane . . . -er.

    Love the ponies. The boys will have such fun.

    By the way, did you see my comment at Noa about the Mullet Post? You need to get on that and guest post that thing over to me, girl. Those mullets need to be celebrated and shared with the world. Let me know!! :)

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  10. I so would have bought that chicken. The hubs would NOT have been pleased. I saw one of those right after The Bloggess' post as my whole family was driving down the beach and almost made the hubs do a U-turn so I could take a picture of me standing with it. But I resisted because he would have thought I was insane . . . -er.

    Love the ponies. The boys will have such fun.

    By the way, did you see my comment at Noa about the Mullet Post? You need to get on that and guest post that thing over to me, girl. Those mullets need to be celebrated and shared with the world. Let me know!! :)

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  11. I really like to comment apparently. A lot!

    Sorry.

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  12. Those metal chickens cost a pretty penny! I think I will take this weekend to learn how to weld and make huge chickens.

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  13. Johi, you, Paula, Misty, Tazer, Hoody and I can all be sister wives! We'll move to Utah, homeschool our kids and braid each other's hair. WHEE!

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  14. I found a giant metal chicken in St. Michaels, MD a couple weeks ago. Boyfriend could not understand my sudden glee. He wouldn't let me get it either - I think the men have united in some sort of anti-chicken solidarity. Cock envy, I say.

    Also? Adopting ponies is badass. I adopted a 17hh "pony" 11 years ago, and at 30, he's still fabulous and sassy and the love of my life.

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  15. Heather - St. Michaels, huh? Hmmm, I may need to take a short trip. Was it super expensive? The hubs would still not approve, but I might have to get it anyway . . .

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  16. @mistyslaws- I like your double comments. It shows enthusiasm. Sadly, my mullet pictures were all taken at least 10 years ago and I can't effing figure out how to use my scanner so they will probably stay in a box under the bed for awhile longer.
    @Paula- I like how confident you are in your learning to weld abilities. That is bad ass.
    @Jen- If I can bring the ponies and Paula welds us a giant cock, I'm so in.
    @Heather- Word. I love it when those tall guys see 30! Do you need a ladder to mount him? I had a 16.2hh flea bitten grey for years. We were soul mates.

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  17. Misty - I was afraid to look at the price because I knew it would shatter the dream of strapping him to my bike and carrying him back to the bed and breakfast with me. Also, we live in a 600 sq ft basement apartment, so Beyonce Jr. would have taken up approximately 1/3 of our available floor space.

    Johi - I stand on a manure tractor to mount- its the only thing tall enough at the barn. We're soul mates, too, but possibly more in an The Odd Couple sort of way. He loves waiting until I turn my back to knock all my expensive tack on the ground, and I love reminding him that a bag of carrots costs more than he did.

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  18. I have a special place in my heart for the horses that mess with you.

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  19. Um, first of all, I can't believe you found a chicken so similar! That's amazing!

    And second, Duke is the best, but if I remember correctly, Blizzard is evil... unless he has changed in the 3ish years since I have seen him :)

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  20. @Emma- Blizzard has been great so far. He really seems to like Cort too. I'll hope for the best. :) Duke is freaking ridiculous in the cute department. The picture I posted on fb of him prancing down the road???? Come on! Too much!

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