Thursday, March 31, 2011

Yes, I'm definitely neurotic.

I have been eating HORRIBLY the last four days. My diet has consisted primarily of coffee, chocolate (in the form of brownies with a fudge topping), red meat, salty/crunchies and wine. Healthy, huh? Not so much.

I finally decided that this splendid diet has been the reason that I have been tired, bloated and cranky all week. I know, I'm like some kind of a genius.

Last night I decided that I was going to commit to eating healthy and exercising! I took the pups on a brisk three mile walk. I decided to have a big fresh salad for dinner. Upon our return I dug into the refrigerator to get the bag of lettuce that I saw my husband bring home from the store on Monday. It was unopened and slimy. So I ate a leftover steak sandwich with a few slices of mushy tomato and washed it down with some red wine and American Idol. The picture of healthy living....

Now about this rotting produce that apparently beckons "BUY ME!!!" to my husband..... I appreciate my husband helping me out by sometimes doing the shopping. I really do. I loathe the grocery store (and the bill) with the same passion in which I loathe fabric stores (migraine, anyone?) and sometimes I would rather stay home and ignore do housework then drag two kids to the store. For some reason, regardless of my countless "lessons" on selecting good produce, the man still always brings home mostly decaying goods. I don't know how to fix this, so I end up either finding creative ways to cook with rotting food or just filling up the trash with nasty slimy stuff (which in my mind is like throwing actual dollar bills away...)

He shopped Monday because we were having dinner guests Monday night. Between cleaning the house, watching the kids, and catching up on laundry (and writing a blog post...what?), I was quickly running out of time. I was frantically deep cleaning all day on Monday so that when my cousin came over for dinner that evening she could breath in my home without going into some kind of anaphylactic shock. She has severe allergies to cats and I apparently had severely allergies to the cleaning the house last week. This was shown to me with a previous visit over the weekend, which resulted in my cousin having to leave because she was getting itchy and asthmatic. This would be fine if I didn't like her, but I happen to adore her so I had to take action. Plus, there is nothing like knowing your dirty ass house is not allowing someone to breathe (which, you know, is necessary for survival) to spur a deep cleaning. I even wiped off the ceiling fans. I know. I think I should get a medal for that. Cat dander- BE GONE! (and I kicked his hairless, smelly ass out of the house for the day). But I digress.....

So today was the start of my "Road to Better Health" kick (plus I am taking a yoga class on Sunday and don't want to accidentally rip ass in a class full of people):

Breakfast: Oatmeal with raisins, cinnamon and soy milk. ONLY ONE cup of Joe.

Exercise: 3 miles on the treadmill accompanied by the standard mental whirlwind of: "This giant piece of exercise equipment is totally fucking up my rooms Feng Shui and we probably need to either move or build an addition because this house is SO TINY but what I really need is to declutter this house and it would be great to have a basement to put the equipment in because is shakes the floor so badly that my tchotchkes fall off the dresser and break and why the hell do I have so many effing tchotchkes? I hate clutter! If I have a bigger house, how the hell will I keep up with the cleaning and we probably wouldn't be able to have such a big yard with a barn and where would Brock build his "stuff" for his business? and should we stay in Ft. Collins or move to a farm back in Iowa? I really miss my horses but could I even handle the weather there? OMG, I would totally miss my friends and ......" wretch wretch wretch! goes my brain.

 This is always what happens to me when I work out, spend too much time inside, read too many decorating magazines....Oh yeah, getting to sleep at night is fun too. I can't even watch the news because all they talk about is horror stories about fatal illnesses and people hurting children and then that is all I can think about. Neat huh?

Lunch: Quinoa with Chicken and Apple Brats, spinach and white beans. (Thing 2 inhaled this, Lord help us all when we introduce him to red meat. I might lose a finger.)

Snack: Only the tiniest piece of the frosted brownie. More like a nibble.... from a baby mouse.

Dinner: ???? I don't know yet. I would say salad but I threw out the $2.50 worth of slimy lettuce. *sigh* maybe I'll have to go to the blasted store. There is always leftover steak sandwiches, wine and American Idol.....

So, as you can see, I am like a highly disciplined soldier on my "Road to Better Health".

Okay! I'll share my lunch recipe. Do you guys even like it when I post recipes??? If not, I'll stop posting them. Just let me know.

Here is the recipe for my lunch. It took about 20-25 minutes from start to finish. It is gluten free.

20 Minutes to Good Food

1 cup quinoa cooked in 2 cups water with 2 Tablespoons powdered chicken bouillon 1 Tablespoon of lemon juice (bring water/bouillon to boil and cook uncovered for 15 minutes.)

Heat 1 T olive oil with 1 T butter in large skillet over medium heat.
Add in the following order:
1/2 chopped onion
2 cloves garlic, minced
saute about 2 minutes
1 package of chicken and apple brats, sliced
~2 cups frozen chopped spinach
1 can drained and rinsed great northern beans
1 1/2 (mostly rotted- bahaha!) large tomatoes
salt and pepper to taste
*I drizzled the tiniest bit (1 or 2 Tablespoons?) of molasses over this. It was good.

Cook until heated through. Serve over quinoa.Congratulate yourself for being so freaking healthy.

I purchased this giant skillet at Target.
Best $40 spent. Ever.

What is quinoa you ask?
This is quinoa!

Okay, I realize that it sort of resembles dog puke.
Once you get past that, it is good. I promise.


  1. Wait wait wait, what IS quinoa?! Some kind of what do they call that fancy stuff made out of fish eggs.... oh caviar? They look like corn with a ring on it like the planet saturn. Only in yellow.

    My healthy eating is always intentional... it's my efforts that fizzle out.

    As for men and grocery shopping.... they'd think it was gourmet if they could get a bag of pork rinds and some beer. Ak for something nice like bananas or lettuce, forget it.

  2. Wow! I'm going to make that tonight! It's just me and the girls for dinner tonight, and it's obviously fate because I have sausage, quinoa, canned white beans, frozen spinach AND rotting tomatoes!

    Ask me to tell you sometime about sending Bruce and/or his Dad out shopping. It's a funny story.


  3. @Furry- Quinoa was of great nutritional importance in pre-Columbian Andean civilizations, secondary only to the potato, and was followed in importance by maize. In contemporary times, this crop has become highly appreciated for its nutritional value, as its protein content is very high (12%–18%). Unlike wheat or rice (which are low in lysine), and like oats, quinoa contains a balanced set of essential amino acids for humans, making it an unusually complete protein source among plant foods.[10] It is a good source of dietary fiber and phosphorus and is high in magnesium and iron. Quinoa is gluten-free and considered easy to digest. Because of all these characteristics, quinoa is being considered a possible crop in NASA's Controlled Ecological Life Support System for long-duration manned spaceflights.[
    P.S. It is really good for you.

  4. Johi! I effing love you for polishing your house for me. And keep the recipes b/c I want to learn from them.

  5. This looks delicious! It seems like such an effort for me to eat healthy, because I live with the pickiest people on the planet so I usually have to fix a separate meal for myself. You know, because I feed my family junk. ;)
    and, my hand to the sky, I was just about to ask you what is quinoa. Thanks for answering my question!

  6. My "road to better health" is always, like, three feet long. I have this all-or-nothing approach, which almost always ends up on the "nothing" side. *sigh*

  7. Quinoa - YUM! My favorite is to use it (with dried cranberries, walnuts) as a stuffing in acorn squash. The husband even loves the stuff, although he insists on calling it couscous.

    Move back to Iowa? That's just the stress talking!! Or some lethal amalgam of leftover steak sandwich combined with one too many tchotchkes and wine. You are one of the lucky ones, you got OUT! I fear I'll be stuck here forever :(

  8. Um, yummo! Another good recipe.

    I like to grocery shop - as long as I am ALONE. If Bubby or Hubby are with - BLECH. But, alone, yeah me ... really I like any kind of shopping.

    "I am taking a yoga class on Sunday and don't want to accidentally rip ass in a class full of people." Yes! But please don't. TeeHee

  9. Food that looks disgusting usually isn't. I'll take slop any day over frou frou. Thanks for the recipe!

  10. @Moxie- I am definitely going to try that with the acorn squash. Yum!
    @Lou- Just in case, don't put your mat behind mine. lmao!
    @Rita- I had a tiny setback yesterday when I dug into the brownies again (not such a mouselike nibble) and I ate half a bag of popcorn for "dinner", but I don't let that define me! Bah!

  11. OMG, I love this recipe! And, for what its worth, I think it looks very yummy...I'm going to put chicken brats and quinoa on the list right now!