You all may (or may not) think I'm moderately witty, but I am deceiving you. I believe (but I am not certain) that the majority of my material is actually stolen from my friends. Not only are my friends hot, they are seriously funny. I could make entire posts from their facebook status updates and it would be much better than this crap that I churn out. I used the word churn I now have a mental image of an Amish woman making butter~ because that is the marvelous way in which my brain works. Back to my stolen material. It is honestly unintentional. I hear things that amuse me, then those things go to my brain's humor storage cabinet, but all the other information (who said it, in what context it was said, why, when, where....) flies out my ear and flutters away into the wind. So if we talk face to face at any point in our lives and you are remotely amusing, there is a good chance I will, at some point, unwittingly quote you. Sorry. I don't seem to be in control of my life
This inability to remember things correctly is why I can't play that fun little game where you quote movies. I leave that to the people who can still actually access their previously obtained information storage area in their brain. Don't get me wrong, I like to smile, nod and laugh at all the funny, silly things that are said in movies; and on a rare and special occasion I might actually be able to identify the actor that spewed the golden nugget of theatrical genius, but I could never repeat a line verbatim. I used all that power up in the 6th grade when my friend and I watched Sixteen Candles 856 times every weekend and memorized every line. EVERY SINGLE LINE. That utterly important task apparently consumed all of the space in the section of my brain that was reserved for jokes, movie quotes, proofs (I never understood those bastards), insurance companies, remembering people's names and sending birthday cards on time. Most information that I need to operate on a daily basis (like remembering my grocery bags...or even the grocery list) now bounces off my brain like a rubber ball. Damn you, and your 80's teen movies, John Hughes!
This is what I look like when someone wants me to play that movie quote game.
|Oh, I love that game.... er... how about Pictionary?|
No? Okaaayyy. We can try.
*I may or may not do this anyway, even though I was raised by humans.
If you entertain me and you later hear something that sounds vaguely familiar coming from my cake hole, it is probably familiar because you said it first. Sorry. You should be flattered, because imitation is the only way I ever flatter people and it means I enjoyed your company.
Let's call it osmosis. Or brain damage. I like osmosis better. I know that this trait runs in the family as well because my mother picks up a strong southern accent when she spends any amount of time with people from Texas.
Ya'll come back tomorra, ya hear?